Write a 250-300 word revision plan for your essay that addresses specific comments from your peers and how you might attend to them. Also, address the bigger-picture needs of your essay as you move into a new draft.
Going from my first draft to second draft I will be focusing on rewording my sentences so that they sound more sophisticated. Some of my sentences were run on sentences or did not have proper grammar, which I will focus on moving to my second draft. Globally, I will be adding in more quotes that connect to my argument in order to strengthen the paper. According to my peer editors I have strong ideas that can be backed up my many of the authors. I will spending time rereading my paper in order to ensure that my ideas flow well, as well as make sense. Also, as I read through my paper again, I am considering rewording my thesis so that the argument I have made truly follows my thesis. One peer suggested that I look into Richtel’s work. He supposedly talked about how adding technology into the classroom allows you to connect with the kids more and they’re more invested in their work. I think this will work well as a counterargument for what I am trying to say.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1MZVIXAIdX1crKLiwxFKVoiD2q7Bxop3UIZxwF00NfOc/edit
